Stanley Cup Playoffs and Robby makes the final spot...

Okay, I know it has been a long fricking time. You know when life just overtakes you and you just feel like you have way too much to do? Well that was not me, I just have been very lazy and instead of taking care of you, TUNDRATALK NATION, I was just doing my thing. Yeah I know I suck. But really, here I am. Back and better than ever. Just in time for the Stanley Cup Playoffs. I need to be here for you during this time of year so you can take my advice and call your bookie and make your bank for the next year. Really, if that is all I am good for, that is pretty damn good. I make you money. Word, as the kids say.

Before I get to that, I have a little bit of business to take care of. The Entourage search, which I started around two years ago has finally come to an end. I know some of you have been waiting with baited breath and are probably a bit pissed it has taken so long. Well, you can just chill out. Putting together a posse is not something you do overnight. You can't just throw a group of dudes together without doing your due diligence or it could really backfire in your face. Just look what happened to McCain when he added that dim bulb Palin to his campaign. Boom.

So here he is the last member of the posse. Robby DuPuis. Congrats Robby. On getting into the posse AND having a kid last week. Evi Marie DuPuis was born last week and I just want to ask Robby, are you sleeping much? By the way, your life is over. Start studying up on the Disney Princesses and Barbie. You are done like dinner. Feel free to send him a line and congratulate him.

Robby is a dude, with whom I first encountered at the Mighty Minot State University. He was, and still is, one of the finest radio broadcasters to have ever lived. Well, short of Howard Stern and Me. We collaborated on many a project and took the broadcast world by storm. In fact we worked on so many classic advertisements that they talked about waiving the age requirement on the Advertisement Hall Of Fame to put us in immediately. But, us, being the completely humble and modest, told them no. I mean the talent and creativity was off the charts. Just CLICK HERE and have a look at the Robby and Chris Connection. Really, who can ever forget the great Dakota Farms ad? I know I can't. Or how about the abstract beauty of the Music Syndicate Ad? Amazing.

But alas, all good things must come to an end. There was a major tremor in the Farce. This tremor shook the world. Robby moved on to Austin Texas to chase ambulances and I moved to Dead Moines to also chase ambulances. The end of an era. The ad world mourned. Robby and I kept in touch but it just wasn't the same.

Until NOW. Now Robby joins the greatest Entourage in the world and the magic will happen again. Well, at least as soon as I win the lottery or my screenplay gets picked up. It will happen. Trust me. Robby now lives in Minneapple and is married with a kid. He still chases ambulances, but I know, in the back of his mind, he longs for the days of thinking up stupid shit so some jag off in a suit can sell a product. I know, that if he had the chance to once again do a commercial for a dry cleaner store that the client INSISTED that his 4 kids (and their dog) be in and it has to be 'different'. He would jump at the opportunity. I just know it. Until then my posse will have to do.

Robby, let us know how you feel...


I was vacuuming the carpet... er, polishing my '67 GTO when I got the life-changing call that I was the final member to be inducted into the TT Entourage. I had to put down my PBR and crack open another to celebrate and regain my composure.

I'm not sure how I've come to receive this high honor, but I assume it has something to do with my willingness to hide Chris' past illegal discretions from the authorities. Of course as a member of the Entourage, that privilege extends to my fellow Entouragers.

As a member of the Entourage I reserve the right to give any of my fellow members a hard time about anything I see fit (especially being a viqueens fan), while making sure we're having just enough fun to stay out of serious legal trouble weather it be over-the-top questionable behavior or just good clean fun.

That's all I have to say. If you don't like it, screw you.

Peace,

Rob (Robby) DuPuis

Thanks Robby, nice to hear from you. Now for those of you in this great posse. The waiting is over. It is time to start working. Make this happen. I am doing all in my power to get us all together for an event that will end all events. Being in this group is not just a title. It is work. It is honor. It is beer. For those of you not in the group, it is okay. You still are a member of TundraTalk Nation. Not an easy group to be in. TT Nation is an elite group of individuals who walk the walk and talk the talk. Now, get it done.

NEXT:

The Stanley Cup Playoff picks...



Okay, now the Preacher sent me an email this morning with his picks, which are as usual, lousy.  Why do you care?  Well, it was the impetus (I know big word) to get me off my ass and get a post up on TundraTalk.  So I guess Preacher is good for something.    Without further blabbering on by me I will get right to it.  Sorry about the italics, I cannot seem to get them to stop.

EASTERN CONFERENCE PLAYOFFS

Washington Captials (1) vs. New York Rangers (8)

Although the Rangers have tended to give the Caps fits I am going to take Ovetchkin and the boys on this one because they have overcome a lot this year to get where they are now.  I am thinking this is the year that Ovetchkin does not disappear and has a decent playoffs.  Sorry Hauser, Caps in 6.

Philidelphia Flyers (2) vs. Buffalo Sabres (7)

I am not a Pronger guy.  Hate him.  He is a big time douchebag.  Almost to the level of Douchmidity that Brent Favre has.  Philly is tough though.  I would love to see the Sabres pull this one out of a hat and get it done for Randy Hawke.  I know that dude is still reeling after the crap that was pulled by DallASS back in the day.  I just don't think they Sabres have it in them.  I want them to, I just don't think it is there.  I hope I am wrong...Philly in 7.

Boston Bruins (3) vs. Montreal Canadiens (6)

Screw Montreal.  Boston in 4.

Pittsburgh Penguins (4) vs. Tampa Bay Lightning (5)

Tampa has a lot of talent on that team.  Loaded.  BUT is their goal tending enough to push them through?  Also can the pretty boy scorers on the Bolts survive the pounding the boys from Pitt are gonna give them?  I think not.  I know it is tough to pick the Pens without Sidney, but I am gonna.  Pittsburgh in 6.

WESTERN CONFERENCE PLAYOFFS

Vancouver Canucks (1) vs. Chicago Blackhawks (8)

This is the series everyone wants to see.  The Sedin sisters versus the reigning champs.  We all know that the sisters disappear in the playoffs.  They have always seemed soft.  Like they go and play with their Barbies right after every game.  I hate those guys.  BUT the Hawks barely even got into the dance.  BUT they also seem to have the Canuckleheads number in the playoffs.  Will this be the year they get over the hump?  Donnie Granato thinks so.  He is scouting for them this year and it seems to be working since they are the Presidents Trophy winners.  I hate to pick against Donnie, EVER.  So I won't.  This pains me to do this, but, Canucks in 6.  I feel like I just put on a skirt or something.

San Jose Sharks (2) vs. Los Angeles Kings (7)

The Sharks are another of those teams that just have it tough in the playoffs.  They have tons of skill and grit but they seem to leave it in the locker room during the post season.  The Kings on the other hand have lost two of their best players, their goaltending is iffy, and they play in Los Angeles.  BUT they have Matt Greene a former Gambler and Fighting Sioux on their team.  Jarret Stoll, a TundraTalk Podcast vetran is on this squad.  Smytty, of the famous Ugly Jacket Scandal is also on the Kings.  You know what, I cannot go against a Gambler.  Kings in 7.

Detroit Red Wings (3) vs. Phoenix Coyotes (6)

You know how much I hate the Wings.  The test is do I hate the Wings more than I hate the whole situation in Phoenix.  Bettman the tool still is allowing that whole fiasco in PHX to carry on.  That team needs to move north, and move fast.  I hate that they can hold this team hostage for 35 fans in Arizona when it could move north and have a full building every night.  Screw Phoenix.  Oh this hurts.  Wings in 4.

Anaheim Mighty Ducks (4) vs. Nashville Predators (5)

This sucks. I hate both these teams.  Is there a way they both could be eliminated?  I wish.  Nashville in 6.

Well there you have it.  Call your bookie.  Bet the house.  Money in the bank. 

Now if you want to see what losing picks look like here are the Preacherman's...

Chicago – Vancooter
With players like former Waterloo Blackhawk Andrew Alberts, Omaha Lancer Keith
Ballard, Michigan god Jeff Tambellini, GB Gambler Vic Oreskovick, the Sedin
sisters, and a good goalie, Vancooter is a quite talented team.  Too bad they
drew defending Cup champs.  Even without Adam Burish and Buff, the Hawks still
have the greatest Fighting Sioux ever in Jonathan Toews.  They had a scare
almost missing the playoffs but they are peaking at the right time.  They are
still the champs and know how to win.
Hawks in 6

Kings – Sharks
To borrow a DX catch phrase ... Hey Kings, I have two words for ya … Joe
Pavelski.  Sorry Davis and Tree, you don’t have a chance.
Sharks in 4

Rangers – Caps
Kinda like the above series.  The Rangers suck and hopefully Derek Stephan gets
traded to a better team.  Alexander the Great will conquer New York.
Caps in 4

Sabres – Philly
I think this is going to be a great series.  Both teams have players that know
what it takes to win the cup, do what it takes to win the cup, and been
there/done that.  I would love to see the Sabres win but Philly has a bit more
grit.
Philly in 7

Nashville – Anaheim
To be honest with you, I haven’t seen either of these teams all season.  Totally
clueless.
Anaheim in 6

Habs – Boston
I love seeing the Habs in the playoffs.  The have great talent especially in
Mike Cammalleri.  But they ran in a better team in Boston and an even better
goalie in Tim Thomas.  If Thomas were in net for team USA, they would have won
the gold in the Olympics.
Boston in 5

Tampa Bay – Penguins
Teams from Florida don’t belong in hockey playoffs, go away.  Even without God’s
gift to hockey, Sidney Crosby, the Pens wont have much of a challenge.  Way too
talented.
Penguins in 5

Phoenix – Detroit
Seriously?  Didn’t they move to Vegas yet?  Don’t rush back Zetterberg, rest
until next series.  Hopefully Bertuzzi pounds that little punk Turris into
nothingness.ONLY 16 MORE GAMES UNTIL THE STANLEY CUP COMES BACK HOME TO
DETROIT!!!

Preacher

NOW GET BACK TO WORK!!!!

My Pick for the Stanly Cup and the latest member of the Entourage...

Yes that is correct, it is time to pick who I think will win the Stanley Cup Playoffs. I was 50% last round. Not great by my standards. In fact I have not been that great at all this year. I was 50% in every round. Not good at all. I need to get back to work on my statistical ANALysis of the NHL and how much I know. No, really I just need to stop picking who I want to win and start picking who WILL win. I picked too much with my heart this year.



Anyway, for the finals I will let you know that I am again going to pick with my heart. In fact as I sit here I am listening to one of my Favorite bands of all time, Nobody's Children, and they are inspiring me to pick not with who probably has the momentum, but to pick with the team that I think deserves it and needs it more.

Anyway, on a related note, the Children are getting back together for a gig in Minot next summer and I am stoked. I can't wait to see if Todd Holdman can still kill the bass, if Micah Scott can still shred, oh and if Adam G can still pound the skins. Check this link to find out more. Oh and here is the music video I did for them back in the day...

Stare - Nobody's Children from hamiltongbp on Vimeo.

Okay back to the task at hand. I cannot wait for Lord Stanley's cup to be handed out and Gary Bettmann gets booed at centre ice. I love that...

STANLEY CUP FINAL

Chicago Blackhawks (2) vs Philadelphia Flyers (6)

I know that Donnie Granato said that the Hawks just did not have the depth in goalie to take it all, and I have been picking against that all the way to where we are now. So I have put in a call to Don to see if he would revise his stance or if he is now on the Hawks and picking them to win. Please wait here while I give him a call.

I just got off the phone with Don and he told me that the two things he was worried about for the Hawks in the post season was Goaltending and the playoff grit. They have answered the bell on both accounts. He said that grit is where the Hawks have had the edge in all series so far but in this round it is gonna be the key because both teams have some much grit right now the ice will be leveled on this count.

He also says that the match up between Byfuglien and Pronger is gonna be the key in this series because if Dustin can get to Pronger it will go towards the Hawks. If Pronger can keep up with the kid the Flyers will be okay but if Dustin can get Chris into the red zone advantage Hawks. He says that Niemi has answered the bell as far as his goaltending goes so he does not even question that. Donnie also said that the city of Chicago is buzzing and he will be at the games this weekend and can't wait to see how this will turn out. He thinks this is a series that is gonna be great because of the grit involved. I agree.

My observation is that Niemi looked a bit rough in the first rounds but he has looked awesome of late and the goal scorers on the Hawks have picked their game up. Guys like Kane, Seabrook, and Sharp were a bit slow coming out of the gate but have gotten better as the playoffs have gone along. J Toews is a beast. Leading the playoffs in scoring and leading his team to the promised land. Might I add he is a former UND Fighting Sioux. Oh and as far as I am concerned they will always be the Fighting Sioux in my book. They can try to change the name but it will never change in the minds of the fans. Byfuglien is a guy who plays the way I would play, well, if I could actually skate worth a damn. He hits everything that moves, scores, and looks like he is having fun while doing it.

As for Philly, as I said earlier, they are team with huge grit. The Hawks could get under the skin of the Sedin sisters and Joe Thornton easy. Those guys need to add grit to their game. The Flyers have Richards, Briere, and my boy Ian Laperriere. As for their goaltending, again as I said in the last round, I keep waiting for him to crash to earth, but he hasn't. Donnie thinks he won't. He also said that the Hawks had Leighton in their system for a while and when he was in the AHL he owned it and knew that it would be that way when he got the chance in the NHL. This is gonna be a great series.

My prediction is that Dustin is gonna make Pronger very angry and Pronger will take a bad penalty that will cost him a game and the Flyers the series. I am taking the Blackhawks in 6. Read it and weep. One bonus to the Hawks winning the cup is a former Gambler will finally get his name on the cup. Adam Burish used to play for the finest team in the USHL the Green Bay Gamblers. Get on it.


There you have it. Call your bookies.



NEXT:


Our next member of the TundraTalk Entourage is none other than the man himself, Cory Blashill. Cory has been in the NHL trenches now for the past few months slogging from airport to airport bringing you all your inside look at what the players are thinking from game to game for Rogers Sportsnet. Thank you Cory for bringing this service to us every year. Oh, also did I mention he also does a helluva lot of drinking as well? Well he does. He is a pro at both of his spring endeavors, drinking and following the Stanley Cup to its final resting place for the year.

As far as I am concerned this guy could have his own Entourage if he wanted to, but he doesn't and that is why he made mine. Cory is also the first Canadian picked to be in this illustrious Entourage. He is a fixer as you would say in the biz. You have a problem, he fixes it. Whether it be you need a bottle for some mixer or you need the hookup to get tickets to the game. Cory knows everyone and everyone knows Cory. Cory is extremely loyal and is one of those guys you want on your side when the going gets tough. I am extremely proud to have him in my posse.

Cory is also a bit of a rebel. A guy who is not afraid to call it like he sees it. I cannot tell you how many times he has called me a jackass. Wait, everyone calls me a jackass. Cory calls me a Jagoff. Cory is also the guy who took the picture of the Ugly Jacket. He took huge heat for that moment in TundraTalk history. Huge heat. He was kicked off the Oilers team charter. His boss was called, as was mine, and he stood tall thru it all. He will not be intimidated. Not at all.

Cory is also the guy who did the great video for me when I got my citizenship to Canada. That was an awesome thing to do. I was really proud that day to have him in attendance at that ceremony. He took time out of his schedule to put that together for me. Killer Job. Here is a link to the video of you want to watch it.

Cory took some time last week out of his busy schedule covering the Stanley Cup to share his feelings on being selected to this posse. I guess you could say he won his own Stanley Cup by being selected to this posse...

As I received at my hotel my letter of acceptance I had to sit down and take a big breath. You might be thinking that I was so to touched by the honor. But I actually had to stop myself from punching Nick Kypreos in the chicklets due to the fact Hauser was picked first, then Nordic Man was 2, with Weiser being selected 3rd. How does a guy with my resume get picked after those guys? That is so weak.

I am now going to play the nationality card. You always draft a Canadian first. We take care off business. When it comes to the Entourage you need a good cop and a bad cop. Guess what I was selected for. Do the math donkey. Don't worry crew I got ya back.

Canadians always come in to clean up the mess!!! I am a one man wolf pack that now has 5 new wolves in my pack. Run free a wild my friends and stay thirsty.

I'm out

C

Cory, well done my friend. I will tell you why you were picked later in the draft. Drama. Pick Cory first, NO DRAMA, pick Cory middle DRAMA. Just remember Cory you and Marty are THE foundation of this Entourage and will be the mainstays. Well, we have two more guys to pick. One for the main crew and one more alternate. Who will it be? Stay tuned for the next 30 or so years and you may find out.

NOW HAVE A GREAT LONG WEEKEND AND GET BACK TO WORK!!!

Shawn Hauser is the first member of the Posse...

FIRST: First things first. I need to give this to you first. CLICK HERE and watch the trailer for the new Trailer Park Boys movie. I cannot wait for this one. Highlight of the trailer - "I'm gonna piss on him Julian. Take the wheel.". Classic. I just about pissed myself laughing at that.

NEXT: Today is the day. Almost like Christmas in a way. Can you feel it? Like the day of Super Bowl XXXI. A day that is filled with excitement and tension. Today is the day I announce the first member of the most ELITE squad of homeboys who will walk the planet as one. A posse to end all posses. An Entourage to end all Entourage's. It is just like Brett Favre to try to upstage us on such a big day. Dick. We will discuss this more later, but first...

As you can see in the photo above that the man who went last, is the man who is picked first. Shawn Hauser, of the Green Bay Hauser's, aka Hauserinskinov, will be the first man to walk side by side with five other guys who all share the same vision. Five guys that will aspire to be THE ultimate. Five guys who every TV show, every awards show, every upscale sports bar, every major sporting event, and every movie premiere will want us to attend.

First and foremost if Hauser was to decide to retire he would not drag it out year after year. He would just shut it down. If you are a member of this elite squad there will be no posturing to leave at the end of the year and join another rival posse.

On that same note, as leader of this posse, there will be no signing of new and up and coming members to sit behind you. I will not be talking about that kid being the 'future' of the posse all the while undermining the current members status in the posse and then eventually pushing him out. If said member wants to come back after a short retirement I will not tell him he can 'compete' for a spot in the posse. That spot is HIS only.

Okay, sorry that I went off on a bit of a rant, but this Favre thing is bugging me. Hauser, as has been discussed at length here in TT, is from Green Bay and is the guy who called that brilliant play two year ago during the Seachicken game at Lambeau where Favre nearly fell to the ground as he passed the ball. Exactly as Hauser drew that up, and called it in to Favre's helmet radio.

What is Hauser's role in this posse? Well let me tell ya. Hauser will be the guy who will drive. Since he has spent most of his life driving self absorbed reporter divas he can handle this position with no problems. He will be the go to guy when the group needs something and needs it now. With his athletic ability and street sense he will have no problems finding us some Funyuns at 2 am in Sheboygan if called upon to do so. Now don't get me wrong, Shawn is not a gopher just to be sent on errands for the rest of us. In this posse it is all for one. We will all gladly jump up to do what the collective wants, we all accept our roles. Hauser is also our hook up for extreme sports if we need a weekend of adrenaline rush.

One plus on Hauser's side is that he is a hockey fan and can discuss it intelligently. For example if some pussy, like say Gary Bettman, decides to say something about how fighting needs to be eliminated from the game he can stand up, be recognized, and tell Bettman he is a tool and he needs to crawl back under his mommy's skirt and shut the hell up.

So, lets see how the man himself feels about this appointment...Hauser, take it away.

Dear TundraTalk,

Well well......What would GW....George Washington (not that other freak that ran the US of A into the ground) have said when his mug was blasted into the side of a chunk of rock? Probably....................ah yah, duh! Bought freakin' time you pushed the plunger and put me up for all to see......and praise!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I could essentially stop right here, nuff said!

Nahhhhhhhhhhhhh, it is truly an honor to be on the rock (as I will refer to it) with my good man the American-Canadian. A great guy that would have yer back anytime and any place, and I reciprocate that feeling! That my friends is what the rock is all about, having your boys backs.

No sense in running smack on the rest of ya'll's......looking forward to seeing who all will make up the complete rock, who else will get blasted on the granite?!

I'd write more but as I speak OLD number 4 is yet again getting the itch to jump off the tractor and lace 'em up.....let's be honest here, that freakin' itch will still be wreaking havoc with him when they are lowering the wood box 5 feet south.....but what the hell...........he provides job security for us media types here in TITLETOWN!

Cross your fingers and hope like hell....that you too can park your mug on the big ol' rock.......time for an Ice Cold Pabst Blue Ribbon.

Hauserinskinov

Nice job Hauser. You did yourself proud in your interview and you deserve to be in this elite group. I will be publishing the rules and regs of the posse soon so stayed tuned fort that. Now if any of you would like to give your congrats to the man, or tell me I am wrong to add him, send me a note and we will publish your thoughts and or concerns.

NEXT:

So Number 4 decided today to come back out of retirement to play for the worst franchise in NFL history. Oh, and click on that last link and look at what comes up. 'Are you ready 4 some football?' it says. Well, I have not seen any good football out of Minnesota since, well, FOREVER. Now I know you could get confused with that last statement and think it is the Bengals. Nope, at least they had Boomer, the queens had nothing and liked it. I know we have discussed this at length here in TT, but I feel compelled to say it all again. Ted Thompson is the reason this happened. Ted himself, not Favre. Had Ted just let the man play, we would not be talking about this now. Just have another look at the pic of him and Mike McDumbshit as Favre is calling it quits. That does not look like two guys who are grateful for all that Favre gave them, but two guys who are scared shitless as to what Favre is going to say. Oh, and Deanna really looks happy to be sitting next to them doesn't she?

Favre is just so set on sticking it to Ted that he is willing to tarnish his legacy. No I am not talking about playing another year and playing poorly. I am talking about putting on the ugly purple jersey and playing for a lost cause. The queens will never earn that capital letter from me. I vow that I will never have to capitalize their name until they win the Super Bowl. Since they will never do that, with or without Favre, I will never have to capitalize their name. Suck it Minnesota.

I do want you to know that this is an equal opportunity website. I have from time to time let those who wear the purple give their opinion. So therefore I have some statements from a few queen fans who hang out here from time to time...

First up is a west coast queen fan. Shane T Keller, who has been involved with the color purple on many levels. As a queen fan, and as an employee of 'His Purple Highness', Prince. That's right, you may as well color his life purple. Take it away Shane....

Dear TundraTalk,

I could take the course of good sense team building philosophy. How it would be better to invest in a younger quarterback that we could build upon and to worry about possible discord in the team ranks and Farve's hot and cold running attitude etc etc.
But no, I am taking the course of unabashed spite and cynicism! I want to dress up the Golden Cheddar Boy of Greenbay in Purple (the color of royalty you know) parade him through the streets of Greenbay Wisconsin and then park his old tired $10 million dollar ass at the water cooler. I don't care if all he does this season is shoot Gatorade into Adrian Peterson's mouth after every down. This will be the best season ever!!

Put that on your Brat and Eat It!!

Shane

Thank you Shane for your unbiased and calm statements. You are really on the fence on this one aren't you? Purple is the color of royalty, but it is also the color of little girls and princesses. As for that parade you are going to have in Green Bay? We had one of those back in 1996, it was called the SUPER BOWL PARADE. Not sure if you have ever seen one of those in Minnesota. Oh yeah that's right you HAVEN'T. Deal with that.

As for him getting gatorade for Adrian, kinda appropriate that he is wearing purple with a name like that, I am all for it. In fact I will agree with you. I think he should ride the pine.

Although I would love to see Ted Thompson eat a little crow if Favre pulled a victory out of his ass against the Pack. Do not take that as me rooting for the queens, THAT WILL NEVER HAPPEN. What that is me rooting against Ted Thompson.

Next up is Steve Iverson, of the Morehead Iversons, and his two or three cents...

Chris:

Here’s my random thoughts regarding the alleged signing of Brett Favre to the winningest professional sports franchise in the 1990’s. No rings, but best winning percentage. Check it out if you don’t believe me.

1.)1. I saw Rosenfels in real life at the first live intra-squad scrimmage on 8/7. I said then he should be the starter this season and that was verified at the first pre-season game last Friday in Indy. Why spend 10 million for getting the same end result (early playoff exit if everything goes good)?

2. 2. That same end result means the Brad Childress era will sometime shortly after the new year 2010.

3. 3. Who gets cut to make room? I say T Jack is gone.

4. 4. This is entirely a move to get an extension to the Dome lease and leverage getting a new stadium deal pushed through the State. They’ll be able to say “we’ve sold out the dome for the last 11 years, blah blah blah” and try to get a new one. Zigmunt needs to open his checkbook a bit more, then they might say “here’s a quarter of a billion”.

5. 5. As always, I will still look forward to the big discounts on Viking apparel right around Christmas as they are either already out or soon to be out of the playoffs.

6. 6. Cheech Harvin is going to be a play maker not se-en since 1998 Moss.

That’s all I can come up with under all the pressure you put me under. Later.

Can you get Leinies in Saskatchewan?

Respectively Submitted,

Steve Iverson

Thank you Steve, for those honest and mostly truthful words. If I did not know you I would believe you were a Packer fan. Which would be okay with us if you wanted to switch. The NFL radio said that Sage had looked good (which is always relative when you are speaking about a queen QB) so far in camp so you are spot on on that comment. Childress will be gone next year, they will sell a lot of seats in that stupid dome, you will get cheap purple gear, not sure about Cheech Harvin, but he has to at least drive over a cop and ride a sex boat, and no I cannot get Leinies in Saskatchewan. Sorry about all the pressure, I just wanted you to bring it.

Well, I will leave you with this. Another open letter to Brent Favre. That's right, I know will refer to him as Brent Favre.

Dear Brent,

Well I guess you have gone and done it. You decided to let that bald Mr. Noodle look alike in Minnesucka talk you into playing again this year. You know what this means don't you? Did you weigh all the implications?

Did you consider all of us who have followed your career up until this point? Did you consider all of us who shelled out cash to buy number 4 jerseys, fatheads, bobbleheads, action figures, Favre pictures and footballs? Did you consider all of the people who have made the trek to Green Bay to eat at your restaraunt?

I guess not. You know that when you show up in Lambeau in that stupid Fu@king ugly ass purple jersey you will get your ass booed off.

I know that you are doing this mainly to stick it to Ted Thompson. I know, I hate the guy also. I hate him almost as much as the viqueens. Almost. On my list of hate he ranks just above Chris Duncan, American Idol, and rectal exams, and just below the viqueens, Hitler and hemorrhoids. Oh and by the way, it is only approrpriate that on the week that I have a procedure schedule to examine my point of exit, you decide to fu*k me there , and all the other Packer faithful, two days before it.

Butt Brent has to do what Brent has to do. You go to Minnesota, you play for however long you can. Just let it be known that every Sunday when you put on that purple dress, that instead of me rooting for you and hoping that every time you throw the ball it is for six, I will be rooting for whatever defense is on the other side of the line will break your legs. LT on Theisman style, and I loved Theisman when I was a kid.

You suck Brent. There I said it. Are you happy?

Chris

Okay, I have a lot to cover so strap in...

Okay, I know I have been away for a while, and I will get to that shortly. But first, I will get to what you all have been patiently waiting for, or in Venckus' case IMPATIENTLY. The Entourage interviews. I completed the final interview about three weeks ago, Shawn Hauser, of the Green Bay Hausers. We discussed many things including, the Packers, WGBA, the Packers, Camera dude stuff, and Brett Favre. Now we here at TT have always maintained the fact that Shawn used to roam the sidelines at Lambeau and send in plays via hand signals to Number 4. All the while never really giving one shred of proof. Cause that is how we roll. Well, I was scouring the internet the other day when I saw this picture. BANG! Proof. There he is on the sideline right as Brett is running the play that he sent in. Deal with that haters. There is by no way any funny business with that photo. It is totally legit. As you can see with the Entourage photo on top, I am not that good with Photoshop, YET.

Anyway, if you want to listen to his interview CLICK HERE or just click the link up and to the right. Hauser kicked major ass on this one. He even said that he had not listened to any of the other ones so as to not be influenced or intimidated by the others. Well Hauser, now that yours is over, LISTEN TO THE DAMN PODCASTS. I am not doing this for myself. Or am I?

Okay, now that I have had time to listen to all of them, compare my notes, eat a few bags of Funyuns, and watch the new season of Entourage, I will post the results. Yes, and I will do it in less than a year. I will drag it out a bit though, we do need some drama.

Just so you know what is at stake here. I will tell you. We will not just have a main posse, which will consist of five dudes and me. Six total. I am going to announce a 'Second Team Entourage'. Two total. Kinda like being Second Team All American. No shame, just if one of the boys in the main group is unable to fulfill his duties. For instance, if we are on our way to the Grammys, and for the sake of an example, Posse Member Number 3 has a conflict (which there are only a few excuses I will detail when I give out the Official Posse Handbooks) a call will be made via the bat phone for a back up. Whammo you are in the show.

Now, for those of you who may be picked for the second team, there is no shame in that. You will be kinda like the Packers Stock that they sold back in 1999. You are an official shareholder, and can attend the meetings, but you are not allotted a vote in the official proceedings. You are the shareholders in the company that is the Posse. Very important.

Okay. I will be announcing the Second team first and will have an announcement later in the week. Good luck to all who participated.

NEXT: The topic that has had the NFL network's panties in a bundle. Yes, the NFL network wears panties because they have yet to invest in REAL cameras for their so called camera guys at each team. Man their video sucks balls. Until they invest in real cameras I will consider them a 'panty wearing' network. Anyway back to the story, Brett Favre finally did the right thing. He decided to NOT put on the ugly purple jersey and sell out to the worst team in the history of the NFL the Minnesota viqueens. All the while they sold a shit pile of those number 4 jerseys to the hapless queen fans. Ha, that is almost as funny as the moron who tattooed 'Super Bowl XXXIII Champs on his arm, before the team even made it to the game. And then said he would just add another 'I' next year when they win that one. Moron. It is always 'next year' in queen land.

I am quite pleased in the outcome for several reasons. One being that I do not have to move the Favre Fathead to the garage. Or I do not have to take the Favre jersey off the wall. The other reason being is how he lead all of queen land on this wild goose chase for a whole summer then dumped on them. Kind of like the actual team does every season. HA.

Now the real question is why? Well I will tell you. I will take credit for this decision. Yup, I am not afraid to stand up and accept your thanks. You are welcome TT nation. You are welcome. I think it all goes back to the letter I penned, or typed, for him back when this ugly, nasty, and might I say, downright shitty rumour came out back in early May. I beleive in his heart last week after a great lawn mowing session, he sat back with a cold Leinie's (Honey Weiss or perhaps an Original), tuned in to Jesse James is a Dead Man, opened a bag of Funyuns, logged on to TundraTalk and re-read my plea. After all who can argue with my logic. I know Donna can't, or gave up trying, one of those two.

No one wants to play for the viqueens. That is a fact. Adrian Peterson, no relation, doesn't. He is just biding his time until he can get the big pay day and go to play for the Raiders and suck. His first choice on draft day was the Pack, it is a fact. Look it up, when you find it send it to me so I can read it for myself. Anyway, Favre is not a queen, in the literal putting on the purple jersey sense. He IS a bit of DRAMA Queen though. Thank you Brett for finally retiring. Now you can move on to Canton. No Brett, they do not have a team there you can play for.

NEXT: Where have I been since June 21? Well I will just break it down a bit. Since this is not a forum for me to just spout off everything I am doing (that is Facebook). This is a forum to spout of on the silly things I am doing and to wax prophetic on anything that is Packers related, or just to show everyone how really immature I am. I will just give you a short list and some pics and video...

Took a bit of a vacation to North Dakota and the Black Hills. Blew some shit up on the Fourth of July and then saw Mount Rushmore and some wild life. I was there when Greenpeace put the banner on the mountain but not at Rushmore that day. Missed it by that much. That would have been cool to see. The Black Hills were great fun had by all.





Went to a few Rider games and got on the score board several times. I am a superstar, oh and I know the right camera dudes, errrr persons. McKenna also performed at half time of one of the games with the Rider Cheer Team. That was awesome. Dakota yelled at a crazy fan for taking off his shirt and McKenna got really good at yelling Calgary Sucks. My kids rule.




Went to the lake and did some boating, swimming and grilling. We got a late start on the season this year but have been trying to make up for it. The weather has not be great but when it is we take full advantage of it. Love boating on the lake.





Took the kids to Buffalo Days for rides and greasy food. McKenna is fearless when it comes to rides and will ONLY ride the rides with her hands in the air. Chip off the old block. We also saw MC Hammer and I did a duet with him on the world wide hit, Turn This Mutha Out. Word, as the kids say these days. They still say that don't they? Check the video. Oh, and as for the bad video near the end, McKenna pulled my hat down over my eyes as she was sitting on my shoulders so that is my excuse. Deal with it.


Hammer at Buffalo Days 'Turn this Mutha Out' from hamiltongbp on Vimeo.



Whew, now that you are all caught up,

GET OUT OF HERE AND GET BACK TO WORK. I HAVE A POSSE TO PICK.

It is so hard being right all the time. Wait, no it's not. Oh and Weiser's Podcast is up and on the air...

Yes, it is hard to be humble. I called it. I told you what would happen, and it happened. Some might call that having ESP, most TV networks might call me up and base a prime time show on me. I just am that good.

The Stanley Cup went to the Pittsburgh Penguins in seven games. If you would like to confirm that I was right, just click here. It was a great final game that was a nail biter from end to end. I am usually very critical of Detroit fans because they hardly ever get to the game on time, or back to their seats for the beginning of the period but I will give them credit for staying through the trophy ceremony and actually clapping for the Penguins. I will also give them credit for booing the shit out of Bettman. I love that. It happens every year and it is worth the wait every year. Bettman is a tool.

I want Ty Conklin's name on the cup really bad, but he just was on the wrong team. If you look at recent history, he has been on the wrong team of late. He was in Edmonton when they lost in seven games to the Carolina Hurricanes. He was also in Ottowa when they lost the cup. He was on the Pittsburgh Penguins last year when they lost to the Wings. I think it is safe to say at this point that if Ty is on your team you will get to the final but winning it is probably not in the cards. In the USHL Ty won back to back championships for the Green Bay Gamblers so he is not a jinx by any means but he did lose the NCAA Frozen Four with the New Hampshire Bears and the Calder Cup (game 7) with the Hamilton Bulldogs. Not sure what to do with all that math.

Let me tell you a story. There is a guy I know named Preacherman. He is a guy from Pulaski Wisconsin. He likes hockey. He also likes the Godless Detroit Red Wings. As he has always done, he will call me or text me after the Red Wings win against the Avs. During this final he took time out of his 'busy' schedule to text me immediately after EVERY game in this series. Of course these texts were not of a complimentary nature. Most of them were very braggadocio. Nice word huh? Yeah, I am kind of a big deal. Anyway, he would most of the time tell me how many games the Red Wings had won. I would always tell him that it takes 4 to win the Cup. He was counting his chickens so to say, which we all know, especially in hockey, a person should not do.

Well, Preacherman has something to say to all of you out there in TundraTalk Nation...

Dear TundraTalk Nation,

I still sit here brokenhearted. When parents say they love their kids equally in their own way, THEY ARE LYING! Every parent has their fav kid. My favorite "kid", the Detroit Red Wings, decided only to show up to a couple of the the Stanley Cup finals games. And it showed by bowing out to my other kid, Sid the kid, and the Pittsburgh Penguins in seven games (as Sign Boy perdicted once again). Chris is getting almost as good with his picks as the stinking genious Arnie Spanier.

As I sat there watching game seven in my Joey Kocur sweater (and Crosby sweatsuit underneath) I realized how much they need Darren McCarty and Chelli out there. The Wings were trying to be too pretty, they need to play that tough game that brought them the past 4 cups. They don't have the skill that they had in '02 (thank God for Brett Hull!) They got ran over, out played, out everything by the Pens. And it does seem like Ty Conkiln is a Stanley Cup curse, even though it pains me to say that. My heart did stop for a little while when Sidney got hurt, but it's all good now.

Mario finally passed the torch to Sid, it's now his league. It was awesome seeing Mario with the cup again. PLEASE Mario, just one more shift. You, Sid, and Malkin.

Preacherman

Well Preacherman, it takes a strong man to admit he was wrong, and boy you were wrong, so I congratulate you on your admitting wrongness. You root for a crappy hockey team and you are not ashamed to admit it. If only you could be as bold about your Lions. Man they suck.

I would like to also at this point say I offered space to Trev Doroshenko to apologize to you, but he would not. He has too much pride (ego) to admit when he is wrong. Oh and he IS WRONG.

NEXT: I had the opportunity to conduct my interview with OG Posse Member Chad Weiser, of the Seattle Weisers, this week. Chad took time out of his 'big city' schedule to make his case for being part of the most elite posse this side of the Mississippi. We are on this side of the Mississippi aren't we?

Anyway, Chad (that is him as Bob McKenzie on the left in the black and white pic) brought the noise and made a strong case for inclusion. He took Marty Frey's smak and handed it right back, he set the record straight on the War Hero in the car wash incident, and did quite well on his movie quotes. CLICK HERE to listen to the podcast or just click the link at the top right of the page. You know TundraTalk is the Podcast that does not suck.

Next up on the Podcast that never ends is Shawn Hauser of the Green Bay Hausers. He will round up our interview process and send the wheels in motion to selection. Unless, Tony Mutzenberger makes a late apperance. Which would be nice.

How will the selection happen you ask? Well let me tell ya. It, of course, will be long and drawn out. I will be selection 5 guys for the posse, PLUS two alternates. The alternates will not have the honor of being in the actual posse BUT will be called upon at a moments notice to fill in for a 'first team' memeber if he cannot fulfill his duties at any time.

On the first selection post I will name the two fellas who rose up to be apart of the the alternate crew. Then I will post once a day until we have the whole crew named. I know, the tension is thick and you cannot hardly wait, but it will be worth it.

Now, Have a great Monday, and GET BACK TO WORK!!!

Okay so I wasn't perfect, but I was close...

The first round is in the books and man was it a gooder. That Blackhawk, Godless flames series was awesome. We can all now enjoy the playoffs that much better now that the flames are done. I hate those guys.

The Hurricanes Devils series was great also. The Rangers showed us all how to choke it out and how to act very unprofessional. Sorry Hauser, but your boys blew.

How did I do, well let's check. Well I was 6 for 8 in picking. I missed the Vancouver series because the Canuckelheads finally showed up for the playoffs and the biggest choke team ever, the San Jose Sharks proved that winning the Presidents trophy doesn't mean shit in the second season. I hate the Mighty Ducks, I hate the Mighty Ducks, I hate the Mighty Ducks. Shitty movie, shitty team. Oh and for the record Preacherman was 4 for 8. Loser. Better luck next time.

Second round picks, here they come...

EASTERN CONFERENCE:

BOSTON BRUINS (1) vs CAROLINA HURRICANES (6)

Now we have a huge series here. Huge. Both of these teams never say quit. Boston is a punch you in the mouth as they whip you team and Carolina plays along the same lines. Carolina also is Ric Flair's team so this makes it a bit harder to pick. My gut says Carolina but my head says Boston. Gotta go with the gut. Carolina in 7


WASHINGTON CAPITALS (2) vs. PITTSBURGH PENGUINS (4)

This one is tough also. I don't like how the Russians play hockey. They have too much skill and are a little too arrogant. Ovetchkin is an amazing player along with his linemates, BUT, I think that the Penguins have the edge in goalies. That goes a long way in this time of the year. I am going to take Preacher's boyfriend Sid the Kid and the Pens in 6.

WESTERN CONFERENCE

DETROIT RED WINGS (2) vs ANAHEIM MIGHTY DUCKS (8)

We all know how much I hate these two teams. So I will just keep this one short. Trev and Preacher, I hate saying this. Wings in 7. I feel dirty.

VANCOUVER CANUCKS (3) vs CHICAGO BLACKHAWKS (4)


The Canucks are another one of those dissappearing teams. Luongo has been playing out of his mind lately and the Sedin sisters have hiked up their skirts and started to play. That said, I love the Blackhawks and the skill on that team. Backed by the Bulin Wall that team can be unstoppable. Youth is the only thing they have going against them. That can be helped by the noise of the United Center but they don't have home ice. The Canuckleheads do. Wow, this one is very tough. I am sticking with the Hawks. Chicago in 7.


Well there you have it, the sure fire picks for the second round of the NHL playoffs. Again, call your bookie and make your bets. I love being right.

Now, GET BACK TO WORK!!!

NHL Playoff picks. Call your bookie and follow my lead...

Joel Witte, of the DC Witte's, sent me a link to the above ad campaign for the Boston Bruins. Freaking amazing. Laughed my ass off. There are three of them and I will put them in this post as we go along. Thank you Joel. You rule.

Okay, as you know, I am somewhat of a prognosticator. Yup, that was a pretty big word. Hope you enjoyed it, I did. Therefore I cannot go into this playoff season without telling you what WILL happen. If you care to remember, and I think some of you don't, I was perfect last year in the first round. PERFECT. Read it and weep. Well, I plan on doing better this year. As I said earlier, call you bookie, and bet the house. Here they are, the winning picks for this years first round.

EASTERN CONFERENCE:

BOSTON BRUINS (1) VS MONTREAL CANADIENS (8)

This one is almost a no brainer. Bruins are mean, tough, have great goaltending, and can score at will. They also have one of the two players I ever saw bend over to get through the visitors locker room door in Edmonton. Chara is a monster and everytime he came in and out of the door of the room at Rexall Place he had to literally bend over to get out. The other guy who had to do that was Eric Boogaard. These two teams hate each other so this will be entertaining, but it will be short. Bruins in 6.

Here is another of their ads...



PITTSBURGH PENGUINS (4) VS. PHILADELPHIA FLYERS (5)

This one is a bit tougher. The Penguins are playing great hockey right now in fact no one has been hotter in the East. BUT, I think the Flyers are another team that will punch you in the mouth while they beat you to the net. I like how they play hockey. A Bruins Flyers series would be great. Sid the kid might have something to say about it though so I am going to go with my heart and not my head on this one and pick the Penguins in 7.

Oh and if there are any Malkin fans out there I have a couple of McDonalds Malkin mini helmets that were only available here in Canada. Drop me a line if you want one.

NEW JERSEY DEVILS (3) VS. CAROLINA HURRICANES (6)

This series I probably will not watch a single game so I do not care about it much. I have never been a fan of the Devils and on that same note Ric Flair loves the Canes so I must also. Hurricanes in 5.

WASHINGTON CAPITALS (2) VS NEW YORK RANGERS (7)

Alex Ovetchkin once ducked us at Rexall for an interview. He went as far as not riding the bus with his team and getting security to lock down the back hall so he could sneak out the back door and get in a taxi. Wasted a lot of my time that night since the lame ass reporter I worked with would not just let it go. Now that I have my rant out of the way, I will tell you that in the same breath I like to watch Avery play hockey. He is a jack hole that does and says some really dumb shit, but he goes hard on the ice. I like the Caps in this one for several reasons. One being that I want Joel Witte to be able to cover the more than one round of the Stanley Cup playoffs and the other being that I just don't think Lundquist can stop the Russians on this Caps team. Sorry Hauser, Capitals in 6.

WESTERN CONFERENCE

SAN JOSE SHARKS (1) VS. ANAHEIM MIGHTY DUCKS (8)

This one is easy. Chris Pronger is a A-Hole and the Ducks, I will always refer to them as Mighty, were named after a shitty movie. San Jose in 5.

CHICAGO BLACKHAWKS (4) VS. THE GODLESS CALGARY FLAMES (5)

This one is going to be awesome. It is great to see the Hawks back in the playoffs. In fact since my team is not in this year, I will be wearing my Chelios number 7 on game day. Deal with that Flames. Every talking head on TV here in Canada is picking the Flames, kinda like every talking head in ND loves the queens. Forget it, the Bulin wall owns the Flames and the Hawks have too many scoring options. Hawks in 6.

VANCOUVER CANUCKS (3) VS. ST. LUIS BLUES (6)

Again another team that has been absent from the dance for many years the Blues finally get back. I love Keith Tkchuk but I just don't know if they will be able to solve Luongo. The Blues are also the hottest team in the NHL going into the playoffs. This could spell upset since the Canucks usually suck in the playoffs. I am going out on a limb here Blues in 7.

DETROIT RED WINGS (2) VS. COLUMBUS BLUE JACKETS (7)

Okay, you all know the hate on I have for the Wings. Well this year the hate on has a new twist. Ty Conklin, of the Green Bay Gamblers Conklins, is now on this team. Whoa, this sucks. I want with all my heart to have a Gambler get his name on the cup. But I do not want to see the Dead Wings win another cup. What do I do? I hate myself, Wings in 6.

There you have it sure fire pics to win. Now GET BACK TO WORK.

How about a bit of Chris from Green Bay for your Monday?

Okay we got some paper work to discuss first before you watch the video I have for you.

James Grandy, of the Minot Grandy's, pipes in after my last rant with a compliment?

Pete,

the world needs more camera men like you Pete, now just learn how to white balance and focus

Grandy

Well thanks James, I think.

Next up is Art Simmonds, of the CEP beat the snot out of A-Channel Simmonds, gave me some props. Me and Art took on the man in Edmonton and we beat him down. Art is and old school union guy who I would go to war with any day...

Hi Chris ..

Enjoyed reading your rant on the media. I gave upon it many years ago, but it still pisses me off. Glad to see there's some people who still work in tv who get it.

Art

Thanks Art, that means a lot coming from you.

Last but not least Chad Walker, of the Score Toronto Walkers, brings us the Toronto side of the coin...

Phew...I thought you were going to rip the Score's coverage of trade deadline day. Maybe you should start ripping TSN for loving themselves way too much. Get over it already you are who you are because you have the most money not because you are so much better than everybody else. Now I am ranting, you got me fired up.

Chad Walker

Nah, Chad, I watched some of the Score's coverage and you guys did fine. I have started watching you guys again even after my self imposed ban of the Score after my experience with a certain reporter that pissed me off every day. I like the new look and I really like the attitude. Gerry Dee is freaking hilarious. Give him more time. Oh and you are correct, I really don't like it when a media outlet pats themselves on the back way too much. It is just so self serving. If you are willing to prop yourself you should also be willing to admit your mistakes. The parent company of TSN is the company that I was ranting about last week.

Anyway, thanks for the response keep it coming...


Sound Off Live Sat Rip Off from hamiltongbp on Vimeo.



So I finally got this one uploaded. It is a bit of comedy that some of us at WGBA did for WOITV in Des Moines. This was for the show Sports Sound Off with Keith Murphy. Just a bit of history...this show is basically talk radio on TV. Keith called me about a month or so after it started. He said he would like me to call in to the show and just act crazy and just be me. He wanted to create a villian of sorts so that would spark his callers to be more 'interesting'.

I was cool with that but I lived in Green Bay. How was that gonna fly? He said it did not matter just call. Well I started to call each week and rail on how much Des Moines sucks and how great the Packers are. We kinda caught a break because this was the year the Pack made their first run at the Super Bowl and won it. So I had a lot to talk about. Oh and the Green Bay Gamblers played Des Moines hockey team and that brought me some heat also.

Needless to say I was not popular. We even taped a segment once where Keith was in GB doing a stand up in the parking lot of Lambeau and I tackled him. Just crushed him. We shot it from about three different angles and they edited it just right to make it look good. People actually believe I hurt him. People are dumb.

Once I made a trip down for Keith's wedding and we went to his bachelor party which was held at Sec Taylor field home of the Iowa Cubs. Round Guy introduced me to someone who was a frequent caller to the show and she refused to shake my hand. Someone also told me that I showed up on a local newsmagazine poll as one of the most hated men in Iowa. Not sure if that was true but I choose to believe it.

So we made a bet, can't remember what it was, but my end of the bet was that I would never call the show again. Somehow it worked out that I lost so I stopped calling. Well, Murph wanted to get me back in so we devised this scheme that I stole a sattlelite feed and announced that I would be back. It worked great because I looked like a loser and was going back on the bet. I love being the villian.

Anyway, for the first time, above is the video that goes along with it. As you can see everyone who is anyone is in it. Marty is in it, Hauser makes an appearance, Venckus Schmenkus gets a question in, the Raffertys are in there, and of course the Nordic Man acts as my security force. Great bit of TV here folks. I hope you enjoy it.

I have a copy of the night where I got my head shaved on the show around somewhere also so I will work on getting that up also.

Now, have a good week and GET BACK TO WORK!!!

An evening that will remain in infamy...

Why may you ask am I smoking that Cuban cigar? Well, I have always wanted to try smoking a cigar I just was too chicken to try it because I figured I would do it wrong and puke. In fact when the boys would get together in Green Bay and play a friendly game of poker in my garage, cigars were always present. As you can see in the pic to the right the Nordic Man has one blazing. I wanted to try so bad but never pulled the trigger. Well, that ended Saturday when after the Ric Flair evening, I decided to give it a go as in celebration of the big moment. Yup, it lived up to the hype. Big time.

Let's go back to the start of my trip. I got on a plane in Regina around 9am on Friday. I was supposed to get on at 8:20 but the fog in Edmonton was holding us up. Once we got in the air and close to Edmonton the fog was still there. So I ended up flying in circles around E town for about an hour. Stupid Edmonton.

So I got in around 10 when I was supposed to be there by 8:30. I called up my boy, Blashill, and we got around 48 wings at Kelseys and went to work. It was like I never moved. We got all the gossip out and about just like old times. After that we went out to Rexall to get his new camera so I could be jealous. Then we stopped by the Eskimos locker room for a visit with Dwayne Mandrusiak, of the equipment managers for the Evil Empire Mandrusiaks. Dwayne is the dude who got me the Brett Faver auto'd football. He showed us the design for the new locker room, we told some stories, drank some beer, and called each other names. He could not believe that I came all the way to Edmonton for Ric Flair. He said, and I quote, "You are a bigger loser than I thought you were." Thank you Dwayne, I appreciate that.

I had a great first day in Edmonton, well almost. After living in Regina for over a year I can honestly say that Edmonton traffic sucks balls. When I lived there I hated traffic, but just because traffic sucks. BUT when you come back and are forced to sit in it after going anywhere in Regina only takes 15 minutes it REALLY SUCKS. Of course Blair called me a pussy and soft, as well he should have.

At this point I was still working out what I was going to say and wear to the big day. It truly was a big deal. I had decided that I was going to go with my Tragically Hip concert sweater from the In Between Evolution tour. Which I Marty later said it had wicked irony and not that irony that Alanis Morisette sings about. Cool. I was for sure going to do the four fingers up for the pic with Flair. Blair came up with the idea of pointing at the camera. He noticed that in a picture, his book, and on the DVD he is pointing at the camera. Nice job Blair, way to do your homework. I wish I would have thought of that. Truly original. No one else did that pose.

As for the question, still a bit up in the air. I really liked the question that McCoy gave me. Thoughtful, interesting, and pretty original. I also was thinking about asking him about the Horsemen. What was his favorite line up. Or maybe what is his all star line up? I also was thinking I might ask him to run a promo on me. Tell me how much he was going to beat my ass. That would be awesome. Just depends on how much time we have with him.

So Blair and I had a great big breakfast at Humpty's so as to not be hungry on the big day. We also tried not to eat anything to gaseous so as not to have the Flair goofy look photo that Marty described so well. Of course Carey, Blair's wife gave us crap all morning for talking too much about it. She will pay.

We headed over to the Myer Horowitz theater on the campus of the University of Alberta around 1:30 pm. The show was scheduled to start at 4 pm (doors at 3). At this point there was a meet and greet already going on in the theater for people who wanted only to meet the man. We bumped over to My Mac Dealer and picked up a few things then came back to hang out.

Now, I am going to say this as lightly as I can. Because of course, I was attending the same event as these guys. Wrestling fan is weird. There was some strange ones in attendance at this event. If you want to see the whole group of meet and greet photos CLICK HERE. I will just say, there are some 'interesting' cats. The best ones are on the last two pages of pictures. The guys in the rock show t shirts are crazy.

Of course 'That Guy' was there. You know the one, the guy who wears the championship belt like he won it. I know, I have one too, I just don't wear it. There was also this guy who came up to me when he noticed that I had a VIP badge. He wasn't all there. He wanted to know if I would get his DVD signed for him. Me being the nice guy that I am, said okay. I immediately knew this was a mistake. I have been planning for weeks what I was going to say and do at this moment of glory and just before go time I let this a-hole throw me off my game. Way to go stupid. He was of course on of these guys who will not go away AND a close talker. Great, this is just getting better. Eventually I convinced him to get it himself by waiting by Ric's limo. Did I mention that we saw Ric arrive in his limo? Check the limo out... Needless to say I dodged a bullet there. I did not need this guys DVD throwing me off my game.

In what seemed like three hours later they opened the doors and we wandered into the theater to sit in our row two seats. It is almost show time and I am sooo geeked you can't even understand. I got my micro recorder ready to record the whole thing and I got a camera all ready to take some great pics. I went to London Drugs on Thursday and bought one of those new Nikon cameras that Ashton Kutcher is shilling. Oh did I mention that I am taking it back on Monday. Yup, use it for the weekend then take it back. I feel so dirty, like the dirtiest player in the game RIC FLAIR!!!


Flair Entrance in Edmonton from hamiltongbp on Vimeo.



It is show time and the Nature Boy enters to the greatest theme music in all of wrestling and the crowd goes wild. You can see his entrance above along with some of his opening remarks. Blair recorded some of it on his camera. Oh, and if you want a CD of the show just drop me a line and I will burn you a copy. I will of course have a podcast of the weekend up soon.

Flair came out and spoke for a bit on several things then opened up the floor to questions for the rest of the show. Which I thought would be cool to ask a question but they made everyone wait in line along the back of the theater to ask your question. I paid for row two tickets so I did not feel like standing in the back of the theater for the show so I decided to wait and ask him in the meet and greet.


Drunk PJ at Ric Flair from hamiltongbp on Vimeo.



I do have a great story about the questions and answer time. PJ Stasko, of the camrose Staskos, was there. I did not see him before the show so I had no idea if he made it or not, until, I hear someone on the mic say in an extremely drunk slurring voice, "I would like to firssst give a shoutttd out to a good frrrriend of mine who is the biggessssst wrasslinnnnn' fan I know, Chris Peterssssson." I look over and it is PJ. Oh man, he is hammered. At this point there is an uncomfortable feeling settling over the theater. Flair was nice to this drunk man who then asked about "kisssssingggg girlzzzssss". Hilarious. PJ came over to our seats and gave me a cool Pilsner Beer stein that I proceeded to get autographed by Ric Flair. Sweeet. Nice job PJ. You drunk bastard.

Flair told some great stories about life on the road with the WWF and WCW and getting drunk with the boys. There was of course the times when some dude would ask flair a Chris Farley type question like, "Remember that time you beat up Dusty Rhodes? That was cool." and to Flair's credit he was respectful to everyone in the crowd.

At one point in the proceedings he was telling a story about Rowdy Roddy Piper and decided to call him up. So he then did. He put Roddy on the speaker phone and we all said hi to Roddy. Really cool the guy has the Rowdy Roddy on speed dial.

If you listen to the audio of the event you hear me laughing a lot. It was a really good time and well worth all the time I obsessed over it. But, it is not over yet. The meet and greet is right after the show and that is when the pressure really hits. I decide that Blair and I will wait an go at the end of the line so as to avoid the guy yelling because I am taking too long. Just before we go in for the meet and greet we see PJ again. He is out of his mind staggering drunk and just happy as all get out. He came over and gushed and gooned us again. Hilarious. After we left one of the people who was working the show told us that 'our friend just fell down the stairs on his way out'. Nice PJ, way to make an exit. He apparently walked it off. PJ rules.

We were instructed that we would only get 60 seconds with the Nature Boy and only can get two things signed. Whoa, that completely throws me for a loop. So Blair and I start our scheming on how to get around it. All the while I am getting nervous about the big event. Now I don't usually get nervous about things like this. After all I am the king of the Brush With Greatness photo. Actually Blashill is the king, I am just a knight. Anyway, I am getting nervous and this whole 60 seconds thing throws me off.

I decide to go ahead anyway. We get up there an Blair goes first. He had around 4 things to get signed and got them all signed. No problem. So much for the 'only two things' rule. Whew, I am next. I have been waiting to meet this guy for around 30 years and it is finally going to happen. Whew, sweating my ass off. Hope I don't smell too bad.


Flair Autograph from hamiltongbp on Vimeo.



Here goes. I walk up to the table, plop down the belt and he grabs the poster to sign. I set down the recorder and he asks me what is that? I tell him it is a recorder so I can record this great moment for ever. He tells me he does not like those and turn it off. I apologize and then realize that he has just spent two hours talking, another three signing autographs so he is tired. I then opt out of the questions and just tell him that it is an honor to meet him and that I have been a huge fan for 30 years. He thanks me and tells me it is his honor to meet me and what is my name. I was at this point a bit in a daze so I did not answer him. He looks at me and says it again, 'what's your name man?'. Oh snap, wake up. I tell him and he signs the poster to Chris. He then signs the mug and the belt and we go for the pic.

I had given my (temporarily) camera to one dude and he proceeds to take a completely crappy out of focus picture. Blairs pic was shitty also. Luckily for them, they paid a dude to take pics for all of us. That one (below) turned out great. This is exactly the situation that I was afraid of getting into. Coming all this distance and coming away with a picture that sucks. I was sooo happy that they paid a guy to take pics. I went as you can see with the four fingers up and I beleive that it does live up to the hype. I can frame this one and hang it with pride in my man cave. Plus I got that Pilsner mug plus a great story to go along with it. I am in the process of getting the belt hung on the wall also. Thank you PJ. Thank you Blair. Thank you Ric for a great evening.



I had my meet, it lived up to the hype, and we went out to celebrate with beers at BP's. Jordi Weidman, of the Stony Plain Weidmans, and Greg Donnelly of the Edmonton Donnelly's, came out also and we sat around and told stories, rousted drunks, and called each other names for a couple of hours. Great time had by all.

Thank you again TundraTalk Nation for helping me get through this with your advice. Really came up huge in my time of need. I will be putting the podcast together in the next few days so make sure you check back for that occasionally.

Now GET BACK TO WORK!!!! WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!