Yep, thats me up there in the pic, standing on ice, with a curling broom in my hand. I know, that is one of the signs of the apocolypse. I even sometimes slow down with the clicker when I go by a curling match on TV. The past few years I have taped the Brier for Marty, maybe that is the reason for my madness. I don't know.
Tuesday night the local sports radio, Team 1260, which I am friendly with a few of the jocks. Well, I guess they know me because I call in and run my mouth a lot. Imagine that, me running my mouth, on talk radio. Anyway, the have an annual match with the Ferby rink (that is what they call a team that curls). I know you now are thinking that I know way too much about curling. They call the match the Death Match. This year it was held at city hall in the reflection pool. In the winter it is not much for reflection, just ice. I went down to get some autographs, thats right, autographs of curlers. I am truly crazy. The guy in the middle with the stogy, cuban, is Randy Ferby, the skip (captain or leader of the team. I know, I need to get out more).
I had a broom( that is the tool that a curler uses, again I know too much about curling) to have them sign it. Not for myself but for a charity auction that I hold in conjunction with my golf tournament(yet another sport that I have learned to play, poorly). Anyway, next thing I know they have me out on the ice throwing stones (That is the object of curling, like a football, or baseball. I am starting to creep myself out with all this info). Just picture shuffleboard on ice. It is called curling because depending on the speed that you throw the rock and the rotation you put on it, it will curve or curl. Imagine a curve ball thrown by a pitcher, that is what the rock does on the ice. I definitely have been here in Canada too long, I am explaining curling to you. Like it matters.
The Ferby rink is representing Alberta in the Breir this year. The Brier is in Edmonton this year. It is like the superbowl of curling in Canada. They have won 4 in a row and 5 total. They also won the world championship. Like it matters. So technically I was on the ice with the worlds best curlers. Marty knows who they are. The rocks that they used in this match were Tim Hortons coffee cans. Real rocks are granite and round. Like it matters. Anyway, I kinda had fun. Usually you don't curl outside, you do it in a bar. That's right, every rink has a bar and that is a major part of curling, beer. So, naturally I am drawn to it, because of beer. I believe that is why Marty does it. Nordic Man is a curler also. Marty does not do too much of it in Cali.
Here I am watching the rock head toward the House (Where you want your rock to go. Kinda like a bullseye on a target). I called Donna and told her that I was going to be late but did not tell her what I was doing. She about fell off her chair when I told her that I was curling. She can't believe that I actually gave it a go.
Well the death match ended in a ass whupping. The Ferby boys put up 7 points in the second end (that is the rounds that curling goes. Usually 10 ends. Man I need to come back to the states and watch more football.) We got one in the first, and not to many after that. Maybe I need one of you to come up here and perform an intervention, or an exorcism or something. Me curling, what's next soccer? Hell no!!!!
Have a good day and GET BACK TO WORK.
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